[Event post]

[token_l]

*Yasu's in the park, sittin' on a bench, eating chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. A pint of it to be exact. She's also throwing out some bread crumbs to a bunch of birds...and grabbing a hand full to eat, herself.

Come bother this TOTALLY attractive young lady.*

Comments

[triade_oscura]

Quite, nya. Having some sort of trouble?

::Waves them up and down.::

[token_l]

Nope, just sitting in the park, feeding the birds and watching you be a weirdo.

[triade_oscura]

While eating ice cream in public. From a pint carton, chu.

[token_l]

*She glares a little bit.*

I'm aware of what I'm doing, thanks. I thought you were supposed to predict the future, not state the present.

[triade_oscura]

Then, I predict within 5 years, if you remain as you are, you will weight 350 pounds, wear only a sundress with flowers, have rollers in your hair, and eat Mac and Cheese with Lima Beans for dinner, nya.

While watching trashy celebrity news shows.

[token_l]

*...she falters a little bit at that prediction.*

A sundress with flowers sounds cute...even if it's on a....350-pound body.

[triade_oscura]

Surrounded by obese cats, nya. The floor entirely covered in newspaper.

[token_l]

How many obese cats are we talking about?

[triade_oscura]

At least 10.

[token_l]

That's...not a bad number...do I at least have a job?

[triade_oscura]

No.

[token_l]

...oh.

Do I ever talk to anyone other than my 10 plus obese cats...? Friends? Family?

[triade_oscura]

You have none, nya.

[token_l]

Oh...


...there's no way you can be right, you didn't read anything. Not my palm or tarot cards. Those stupid sticks can't possibly predict anything either.

[triade_oscura]

They locate water, meow. And prophecy is merely grasping minor details and extending them. I can read your future if you want. Though I'd honestly just getting a nose job and a tummy tuck, nya.

::Points the sticks down at the pavement. Hrm....::

[token_l]

....Nose job and tummy tuck?

[triade_oscura]

You have a rather fat gut and a large bulbous nose, miss. I suggest liposuction for the former.

::Pulls out a 50's Ray Gun, while shuffling the other dowsing rod into her hand.::

[token_l]

*She runs her hand against her nose. She's had that fat body image all along, but she never considered her facial features...*

I kinda do, now that I think about it...

...What the hell is that gun for?!

[triade_oscura]

Water drilling.

::Zaps vertically. A hole is drilled, Mira waits.::

You also have very flabby arms and thighs. I can suggest someone, perhaps, nya?

[token_l]

...Sure. Humor me. Suggest someone I could see about my flab.

[triade_oscura]

::Walks over to Yasu, as a smile geyser blasts up.:: I have three I can.

::Hands out three business cards. One for a Dr. Pith, one for a Dr. Pythia, and one for a Dr. Eusebius.::

They're all quite good, chu.

[token_l]

*Looks over the business cards...*

...

Dr. Eusebius??

*Mentally pictures Erland, Vidya, and Shiyoko as plastic surgeons and it hurts her brain.*

[triade_oscura]

Very good at fixing girls up. Takes them with all their little flaws and polishes them up good.

::Follow the brain hurting. Embrace it.::

[token_l]

*The question is...which one of them is it. Or if it is one of them.*

...Yeah. I guess.

How are the other ones?

[triade_oscura]

Both eminently qualified in the field. Dr. Pith is more straight and to the point with her work, while Dr. Pythia is more piecemeal, little cuts. I really do suggest you go, nya. You have the start of a second chin, chu chu.