[Event post]

[token_l]

*Yasu's in the park, sittin' on a bench, eating chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. A pint of it to be exact. She's also throwing out some bread crumbs to a bunch of birds...and grabbing a hand full to eat, herself.

Come bother this TOTALLY attractive young lady.*

Comments

[token_l]

With good reason. You look like a beer kinda guy.

You are pretty normal as far as our conversation has gone. I consider myself pretty ordinary as well. No extra limbs, no alter ego, no megalomaniac intentions, no tentacles...just a normal mcnormie.

[beastkingnaoma]

"Why do people say that.

Yep. Normal. Which technically makes us abnormal."

[token_l]

You're a big and burly manly man from Manhattan. Appropriate type for a beer lover.

...That's actually really nice to think of it that way.

[beastkingnaoma]

"...People assume I'm a jerk too. Which I am! But in an entirely different way!

It kind of is."

[token_l]

Well, between you and me, we've already established you're a jerk since you'd even consider making a fat joke around a girl.

It kinda makes me feel special. Like I stand out ironically in a crowd of weirdos, you know?

[beastkingnaoma]

"I only make fat jokes around girls whom I have or have nearly put it into!

It makes me feel sort of like god. Especially that time I blew up the ancient sumerian god. Or when I beat up Thor."

[token_l]

That's even worse! You have physical intimacy with a girl, and then you make fun of them. Jerk.

You have more courage than I do to actually deal with the weirdos while at a "normal" disadvantage.

[beastkingnaoma]

"If I have physical intimacy with them they obviously know I find them hot!

I consider myself superhuman."

[token_l]

That's still pretty tool-ish. Even if you mean it out of affection, it's a sensitive topic for girls. Like myself.

...Are you actually superhuman, or is that just an ego thing?

[beastkingnaoma]

"I usually say it while squeezing their boobs though...

Oh it's an ego thing. I have a big ego."

[token_l]

...so in the heat of the moment, you speak a sweet nothing into her ear that goes like this.

*In a demonstrative way, she starts groping her own chest and speaks in a deep voice.* "Mmmm babe, you're so fat."

Real smooth, dude.

[beastkingnaoma]

"Naaaah it's a lot less 'heat of the moment' and more 'I'm being an idiot'."

[token_l]

God, you must be awful at foreplay, if that's what you say.

[beastkingnaoma]

"I don't do it during FOREPLAY, geeze. I might just come up behind them when they're doing something and ask if they've been eating more because their chest is bigger."

[token_l]

I was just TEASING, jeez! That sounds kinda cute actually. I've been with a guy who was much more a jerk and did that in a more assholeish way.

[beastkingnaoma]

"How do you do it like an asshole? Squeeze hard and then call the girl fatso?"

[token_l]

Squeeze my belly fat or butt really hard and tell me "It's really gross how fat you are, maybe you should lay off the french fries." So basically...yeah.

[beastkingnaoma]

"....That sounds terrible. I'd never do anything like that. Although squeezing stomachs sounds nice."

[token_l]

...Why?

[beastkingnaoma]

"I dunno. It's kinda like boobs but less erotic and more intimate.


...Not hard!"

[token_l]

I suppose you'd be the kind of guy who'd like blowing raspberries on a girl's belly too, huh?

[beastkingnaoma]

"...That seems cute."

[token_l]

Yup, I knew you'd be the kinda guy to like that. It sure is. It tickles.

[beastkingnaoma]

"..What made me seem like the kind of guy to like that?"

[token_l]

Well, you like tummies and think they're cute, even if they're pudgy. You also seem like a softy for cute cuddly antics despite your jerkish manly exterior.