[Event post]

[token_l]

*Yasu's in the park, sittin' on a bench, eating chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. A pint of it to be exact. She's also throwing out some bread crumbs to a bunch of birds...and grabbing a hand full to eat, herself.

Come bother this TOTALLY attractive young lady.*

Comments

[token_l]

What the hell is it with you people and cannibal jokes?!

[beastkingnaoma]

"..Who else made a cannibal joke? Also it was more in reference to the sex as food thing."

[token_l]

...Oh, that makes sense. Well, it was this girl named Saiga. She was just messing with me, but still, you can never be too sure with this city. Anything's possible.

[beastkingnaoma]

"Well one of my exes was the vessel of an ancient sumerian god, yeah."

[token_l]

...I...I'm sorry to hear that? Ice cream for your baggage?

*Holds out the pint, with spoon. This chick is weird.*

[beastkingnaoma]

"No it's fine I blew a giant hole in the god and then.. she.. kinda dumped me."

He sulks.

[token_l]

I know how it feels, buddy. I've been the dumper, but also the dumpee...it sucks. Especially in the context of some strange supernatural, cardgame-related situation.

*She pulls a can of beer out from the bread crumbs...*

Beer?

[beastkingnaoma]

"...You go ahead. I'm sort of uh. A lightweight."

[token_l]

...

*Looks up and down at Jinn, estimating his size.*

...Really? A big guy like you? Lightweight?

[beastkingnaoma]

He's at least 190 pounds and around 6'2.

"Well I never really drank...also I was like 5'5 until I was 18.."

[token_l]

...Ah. Apologies then. Alcohol, and now food, are both my outlets for stress...more for me!

*She pours the beer in her ice cream. She is quite the lady, yes.*

I understand about the whole being dumped thing. That ex-girlfriend? I was the idiot who dumped her because I couldn't handle her being a succubus and having to sleep with others in order to live. It's heavy stuff...but she's with someone better now.

[beastkingnaoma]

"I got dumped because...I don't even know why. I think she wanted to become an emu farmer or something. Did you just pour that beer into the ice cream."

[token_l]

Yes, I did. It's like a root beer float, but better. I ain't gettin' any skinnier here so, why not?

Sometimes there's just no rhyme or reason to break ups...it's a cruel and sick world. This is why I can't get myself to commit to a relationship, there's so much room for hurt feelings and I just can't deal with those anymore.

*Eats her beer / ice cream mixture. Lovely.*

[beastkingnaoma]

"I re-iterate my point that you aren't fat.

...Well, yeah, those suck, but at the same time I feel like the good parts make up for the bad parts. Sometimes."

[token_l]

And I reiterate my point that we see fat in different ways.

...Yeah, sometimes. I think the worst part about it is since I can't get into a real relationship, I sleep around with strangers instead. Isn't that just...awful...

*...sulks and eats.*

[beastkingnaoma]

"Yes. In the manner that I only see fat that's. Actually there?

I have to actively try not to sleep with anything I can. Any girl thing I can, I mean."

[token_l]

Oh, it's there. You're not looking hard enough. Do I need to put your face in it?

You're better than me, man...I mean, in the last couple of weeks, I haven't gotten much. No one wants to do it with a whale.

[beastkingnaoma]

"That might help.

You aren't a whale. Do you want to see some heavier girls? Cause I know some."

[token_l]

You really want me to shove your face into my stomach fat? It might engulf you whole or something.

If you're going to pull out a mirror, I'm going to punch you. But yes. I do.

[beastkingnaoma]

"..Your stomach looks fine.

Go find Shiyoko..Kurochi? I forget, Monica no last name, or Seiya Kamasu. Those are what actual heavier girls look like. And even they're just sort of chubby."

[token_l]

Noooo, it's not flat, therefore, there's fat.

*She lifts up her shirt, and it's really not as fat as she's making it. It's quite pleasant, really.*

Hmm. I'll try to find these girls. I dunno how much seeing them will make me feel better, though. Maybe I could try to hook up with one....

[beastkingnaoma]

"...It looks very nice.

One of them is married, one is technically a zombie, and one is a robot."

[token_l]

I guess...if you're into that sorta thing it would. Some guys are.

...You can't compare humans, zombies, and robots in terms of size and shape.

[beastkingnaoma]

"I'm not a chubby chaser you look fine!

And yes I can, when they're all basically human."

[token_l]

So you'd hypothetically tap this, right? If you weren't on that anti-floozy thing, hypothetically.

No. Robots and zombies have different metabolisms than humans. Not to mention probably a different diet...but you're probably referring to vastly different robots and zombies from what I'm thinking.